Judge Dredd (1995) Review: The Stallone Comic-Book Movie That Deserves a Retrial

The Slept-On Cinema Case

The hosts don't pretend it's flawless. Stallone himself has said the production never settled whether it was an action movie or an action-comedy, and you can feel the two feet in two worlds. But Grobe's rule for the episode is the right one: look less for the faults and more for the fun. The visuals of Mega-City One were years ahead of their time; Grobe calls them "Mandalorian-esque" and Stan is sure the show borrowed from this film. The sound design turns every boot step and gun click up a notch to sell the comic-book pop.

And the reputation as a flop is overstated. It opened at number five in the first week of Apollo 13 and the third week of Batman Forever (another Slept-On alum), took $12.3 million opening weekend, and finished at $113.5 million worldwide on a $90 million budget. As Grobe notes, it had more action figures than Apollo 13.

The first pick

Stan took the opening first overall and nobody argued: on-screen text AND narration, delivered by James Earl Jones, who isn't otherwise in the movie. Stan calls it "the greatest thing I've ever seen for opening a movie ever." Both hosts' wives, separately, sat down to watch the moment he started talking. Grobe's first pick was Armand Assante as Rico, who goes roughly an hour and twenty-three minutes before blinking and looks like he's having more fun than anyone else on set.

Also drafted: Stallone's jaw (Grobe: "When you see Stallone's jaw, that's the movie"), the sound effects, the "recycled food" announcement ("good for the environment, and okay for you"), the plane conversation where Rob Schneider holds up a mirror to Dredd, and the Armand Assante "I am the law" dubstep remix. Sleeper pick: looking into someone's eyes to see if they're lying.

BOLOs

• Comic books, flying cars with no lanes, and text that is read to you superbly.
• James Remar (the show's second, after 2 Fast 2 Furious), the dad from Dharma & Greg, Hershel from The Walking Dead, and the bad guy from Beerfest.
• Cargo shorts, an ancient puzzle, a very tidy locker, and a crowded Statue of Liberty.
• Sauceless spaghetti, recycled food, a full house of cannibals, and an exceptionally graphic roasted human.
• A great muscle reveal, well-timed thunder, purring robots, and one of the best face scars on the show.

Worth watching?

Yes, and it's under 90 minutes, so there's no excuse. The hosts' one change: pick a lane. Stan thinks the action-comedy needle is nearly impossible to thread without a perfect script and cast, and the film would have been an easier blockbuster leaning one way. Grobe just wanted five more minutes inside Mega-City One, because every shot of the city was the best part. Favorite part of Mega-City: Stan took the Statue of Liberty crammed between tenements, Grobe took flying wherever you want with no lanes. Bumper sticker: "I am the law," with "You betrayed the law" as the runner-up. Drinks to pair: the Lawgiver (a tall whiskey and Coke ringed with shots; drop one in each time Dredd changes ammo, armor-piercing is Everclear) or Stan's Mega-City One Mule, a Moscow Mule with blue curaçao for futuristic blueness.

Production observation

Gianni Versace designed Dredd's uniform, and yes, the codpiece is bulletproof. The ABC Warrior robot's name isn't lazy: Atomic, Bacterial, and Chemical resistant. Rob Schneider is 5'3", which the hosts suspect is exactly why Stallone (5'10") looks like a giant next to him. Stan is also glad it went R, even if the only thing that earned it was the spit-roasted citizen at the cannibal homestead. Spin-off pitches: both hosts want the same thing, a multi-season series about the rest of the map: how Aspen became a prison, what's happening in Mega-City Two and Texas City, the Cursed Earth, and a prequel showing how the climate and then society went off the rails. Dredd doesn't even need to be in it.

Keep the movie night going

• Daylight for the other half of the show's back-to-back Stallone double feature.
• Batman Forever for the comic-book movie it shared a summer with.
• Underrated 90s Action Movies for more of the decade's big swings.
• The Qualification List for every movie the show has defended.